Showing posts with label Temptation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Temptation. Show all posts

Thursday, January 30, 2025

What King David DIDN’T See from His Roof

Among the most familiar sins recorded in the Scriptures is King David’s adultery with Bathsheba. Why did he do it? How can we learn from his experience and avoid repeating it? The text describes this incident in 2 Samuel 11, and it begins by telling us what and whom David saw.

2 Sa 11:1 Then it happened in the spring, at the time when kings go out to battle, that David sent Joab and his servants with him and all Israel, and they destroyed the sons of Ammon and besieged Rabbah. But David stayed at Jerusalem. 2 Now when evening came David arose from his bed and walked around on the roof of the king’s house, and from the roof he saw a woman bathing; and the woman was very beautiful in appearance.

Here’s a start at least. David did not go out to battle, as kings would typically do. Whatever the reason may be, whether his laziness, his selfishness, or simply his age, a simple fact remains. If David had gone to battle, what happened next would not have happened. Think about how one decision opens the door to multiple consequences. I have often heard and said, “Decisions determine destiny.”

While our choices do cause consequences, our choices are also often caused by previous factors. One of my mentors used to say, “Before something happens, it’s about to happen.” In other words, before one commits sin with his heart, his eyes, or his hands, one must recognize and address the things that could precede sin and increase his temptation to sin.

Romans 13:13-14 tells us, “Let us behave properly as in the day, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual promiscuity and sensuality, not in strife and jealousy. But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts.”

“Make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts” implies that we should exercise foresight or forethought in advance. In a very real sense, David sinned because he had not predetermined that he would not sin. Likewise, if each Christian man prays and chooses at the beginning of each day, “Today with God’s help I will not look lustfully at a woman,” he is making provision (anticipating ahead of time) not to take advantage of opportunities to sin.

The Christian man says, along with Job, “I have made a covenant with my eyes; how then could I gaze at a virgin” (Job 31:1)? If David had made such a covenant, think of what would have followed instead when he first saw what he saw.

David saw a very beautiful woman bathing while he was walking on the roof of his house. It is true to say that David sinned because, when he saw Bathsheba, he chose to lust after her, and he failed to curb his sinful desires.

David’s actions parallel those of Achan in the days of Joshua that cost Israel the battle at Ai. Achan admitted, “I saw the forbidden items … I coveted them … I took them … and I hid them” (Josh 7:20-21). Likewise, we read in James 1:14-15, But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death.”

However, to say that David sinned only because of what he saw – a beautiful woman bathing – is only partly correct. Actually, David’s sin also resulted from some things he failed to see from the top of his palace. In fact, if he had paid attention to some undeniable realities, he might have turned his eyes away from Bathsheba.

David had some major blind spots. So do we, whenever we choose to disobey God. By noting his blind spots, we will be much more able to deal with our own.

1. First, David did not see the people’s need for his leadership in the war. As stated above, it was at “the time when kings go out to battle” (2 Samuel 11:1) that David sent others to war but stayed home himself. Israel’s army may have won against the Ammonites, but her king lost his war, because he did not lead. The same is true today. Before you sin, ask: “How will this action affect my ability to lead and influence others for the Lord?” “Is my devotion to showing others the way serious enough that it helps prevent me from losing my way?”

2. David also blinded himself to the past experiences, failures, and consequences in the lives of others. Since the beginning of time, David must have known what had become of others, perhaps many others, each of whom had sinned immorally by committing adultery with someone else’s wife. They were caught. The woman became pregnant. They were unable to cover it up. A marriage died. A lifetime of guilt and shame ensued. David didn’t see, or refused to see, that his experience would be no different. He failed to learn from those who preceded him. Before you sin, ask: “Who do I know that took a similar action or made a similar decision, and how did that work out for them?”

3. In addition, David didn’t recognize the corrupting, corrosive effect that absolute power can have on a man. He can begin to think that he is above the law, that he wrote the law, or that he can ignore the law. David’s authority could have swollen his ego to such an extent that he was unaware of how far he had fallen already. Before you sin, ask: “Am I so proud, so narcissistic and self-absorbed, that I believe than I can disobey God’s rules and treat other people as objects?”

4. David overlooked his good friend, Uriah the Hittite, who was Bathsheba’s husband. This man was one of David’s “mighty men,” his most loyal followers (2 Samuel 23:39). When David saw Bathsheba, he did not see himself deceiving her husband Uriah, getting him drunk, and having him killed. If he had, he might have denied his own lust and temporary pleasure. Before you sin, ask: “How will this decision affect my friends and those who have put their trust in me?” “How will this action destroy rather than protect the purity and sanctity of my friends’ marriages?”

5. This mighty king failed to see an innocent baby. The child conceived by David and Bathsheba would die as a part of David’s punishment (2 Samuel 12:14). If the king had foreseen the baby suffering with an illness for seven days, the sorrow that David himself would experience, and the lifetime of guilt that he would carry, he might have avoided his adulterous encounter. How many sinless babies have been aborted, their precious lives thrown away, as the result of sexual misconduct? Before you sin, ask: “How will this choice affect my children and other innocent people?” “Would I be willing for my young daughter, niece, or granddaughter to know that I did this?” “Would my son, nephew, or grandson respect me if this action became known?”

6. David became blind to his loyal wife, Abigail. This good woman provided for David and kept him from sin, in spite of her foolish husband Nabal. She became David’s wife after Nabal died. See 1 Samuel 25. How would David’s choice of another woman affect Abigail? Apparently he never asked. Before you sin, ask: “How will this conduct affect my dedicated, God-fearing spouse and my covenant before God to be faithful to him or her until one of us dies?”

7. King David lost sight of His children – Tamar, Amnon, and Absalom. Turmoil would characterize David’s household from this point forward. The sword would never depart from his house (2 Sam 12:10). David’s son Amnon would assault and violate his own half-sister, Tamar. Her full-brother Absalom would murder Amnon, become a fugitive, and take over the throne for a time. These sons carried out the very things recorded in David’s playbook. David would hear of Absalom’s death and mourn, saying, “Would that I had died instead!” Before you sin, ask: “How will this behavior affect the way my children turn out and the long-term direction of future generations?”

8. David lost sight of his God-given throne. If David had realized that, because of his immorality, he would forfeit his anointed position as king and run from his own son, would he have sent for Bathsheba? Likely not. Before you sin, ask: “How will this deed affect my calling to serve the Lord in my current position?”

9. At the heart of it all, David did not see God when he was on the palace roof. He became blind to God’s authority in his life, God’s righteous wrath toward sin, God’s broken heart when one rejects His will, and God’s grace, which had blessed and sustained him from the beginning. Before you sin, ask: “How will this decision affect my relationship with the Lord? My prayer life? My spiritual peace and confidence? My eternal salvation?”

What happened to David can happen to us. Peter wrote by inspiration: “For he who lacks these qualities [of spiritual growth just mentioned] is blind or short-sighted, having forgotten his purification from his former sins” (2 Peter 1:9).

It is when one sees what he wants to see rather than what he ought to see that he either runs into a wall or falls off of a cliff.

Do you want to be strong and prepared when temptation arises? Then take some time, go up on your palace roof, and see the things that David didn’t see from his roof. When you see what you ought, God will help you to do – and not do – what you ought.

Sunday, May 06, 2018

Winning the War Within - Its Myths


So as a great problem-solving hero, how about Barney Fife? Ha! Every episode has a common thread. There is a crisis. Sheriff Andy Taylor is calm and cool. Deputy Barney Fife is over-confident, and he rushes off to solve the problem. He fails. Sheriff Andy rescues him and saves the day. The next episode repeats the cycle. So does the next, and the next after that.

Search the blog for recent posts on Civility, Modesty, Gender Surrender, and  Keys to the Kingdom (the Sermon on the Mount).
Luke 4:1-13
Do you every feel that way in your battle against temptation and sin? We all do at times.
So far in this series we have considered:
The War Within
1. Its Nature – Inner Wrestling
2. Its Cause – Competing Desires
3. Its Base – Starting Point
4. Its Schemer – Satan
5. Its Governor – God
6. Its Pivot – Prayer
7. Its Predictability – Process
8. Its Sword – Scripture
9. Its Support – the Church
Now let’s focus on …
10. Its Myths – Assumptions
Until we understand the myths of spiritual warfare – the false assumptions we may have accepted – we will continue to live by them and suffer in our struggle. So let’s expose and reject them!
The first myth we need to debunk is the idea that someone else is responsible for my decisions and actions.
Summarize the chapter about Harry S. Truman in the book, The Traveler’s Gift, by Andy Andrews. “The buck stops here.”
MYTH: We are forced into temptation by the choices and actions of others.
Gen 3; Ex 32; 1 Sam 15
Jas 1:2-18
We may try to blame God for our desires.
The devil made me do it.
Our parents, siblings, boss, circumstances …
Sin is the response we choose.
No one can make us hate, lose our temper, curse, retaliate, etc.
MYTH: We “fall” into temptation accidentally or unintentionally.
1 Tim 6:10
Jas 1:2-18
I was just walking along, minding my own business, thinking good thoughts, even praying, when suddenly the ground opened up and I fell into a hole!
Aaron: “Out came this calf!”
1 Tim 6:10 uses the phrase. But the people “fall into temptation and a snare” because they first want to get rich.

MYTH: We sin and displease God just because we are tempted.
Luke 4:1-13
Jas 1:2-4, 12
God does not tempt us, that is, entice us to fail.
God does test us and try us, that we might grow strong and pass.
MYTH: We always become weak and weary after we battle temptation.
Luke 4:1-13
Jas 1:2-4
Rom 5:1-11
Not necessarily.
Push – don’t move – the rock.
Trials mature us.
MYTH: We will cease being tempted once we are spiritually mature.
Luke 4:1-13
Rom 7
Our continual wrestling with sin is actually a mark of maturity, not a contradiction of it.
MYTH: We face unique temptations that are unlike those of other people.
1 John 2:15-17
1 Cor 10:12-13 Common to man.
Heb 4:15 Tempted in all points as we are.

MYTH: We overcome temptation by physically running from it.
1 Cor 6:18; 1 Tim 6:11; 2 Tim 2:22
Rom 12:1-2; Col 3:1-17
Fleeing from sin rescues us from sinning on that one occasion.
People run from jobs, neighborhoods, cities, churches, and even spouses!
But temptation primarily occurs in your mind.
Rom 12:1-2 God can renew our heart and mind.
MYTH: We will never get past temptation. We are doomed to fail.
Rev 21:1-8
Temptation will inevitably have the last word.
Truth – the winner is the one who is still fighting when the bell rings!
Possible hymns:
Farther Along
The Battle Belongs to the Lord
My Eyes are Dry
Humble Yourself in the Sight of the Lord
Restore My Soul
Love Lifted Me

Monday, February 12, 2018

Winning the War Within - Its Support


We urge you, brethren, admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with everyone. See that no one repays another with evil for evil, but always seek after that which is good for one another and for all people. 
1 Thess 5:14-15
When asked for sermon topics and concerns last month, one of you wrote: “Any sermons on building stronger Christian relationships and accountability. For example, strong Christians encouraging the weak. Loving people who are marginalized bringing them into the work of the church.  Having eyes for those who worship with us but don’t feel accepted and comfortable. Marks of true discipleship: love, forgiveness, patience, etc, and what this looks like in our Christian friendships. May we have eyes to see all those who need to be talked to...and greeted and sat by, and checked on.  We could grow the church so much if we just could grow those who already are with us to deepen their love, their need for the body of Christ, and their involvement on a personal level.” 
So let’s talk about the church as God’s support group in our war with sin.
These are sermon notes, not written in a polished or finished manuscript form. To see the video of this and other sermons:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCu4zUK_ahzdiU15PL6dcAXA/videos
To see thumbnails of all posts on this blog:

Review:
The War Within
Previously:
1. Its Nature – Inner Wrestling
2. Its Cause – Competing Desires
3. Its Base – Starting Point
4. Its Schemer – Satan
5. Its Governor – God
6. Its Pivot – Prayer
7. Its Predictability – Process
Most, but not all the material in these lessons is original. Charles Stanley’s book, Winning the War Within, is one source I have used.
Its Support
1 Thess 5:1-22 – Read and highlight the text.
You are not alone as you wrestle with temptation and sin! When you isolate yourself from others, you open yourself to the devil’s attacks. You feel battle-weary, so you withdraw farther, and then you become even more worn-down. It’s a vicious cycle. Stop it! The church is God’s support group, sharing His unlimited resources to help you win this war.
Interview with Jason – November 3, 1999
Entered the reserves.  Basic training summer, 1999, in Fort McClellan, Alabama. Trainees would put on their uniform, pack their equipment, and report. If they forgot something (or left it out on purpose), they would suffer consequences.  Often brought canteen with no water.  Had to go thirsty all day.
If the drill sergeant could get your rifle away from you at any time, day or night, you would have to work out.  Run laps, do pushups, etc., to “earn it back.” At night, Jason would sleep with his rifle inside his sleeping bag!
Others used duct tape to tape their rifles to their legs.  To pull the rifle would also pull the leg and wake the soldier up.
Had to carry some items they thought they might not need.  Some tried to leave them out, to make the backpack lighter and allow more space.  Such items as tent rope, tent pegs, gas masks, magazine for rifle.
Later they would need these things and not have them.
Urban assault training – secure buildings, knock down doors.
That experience – lacking the right equipment at a critical time – would transform their preparation and packing for the next excursion.
Interdependence – Jason and his peers went through 1/4-mile-long sewer tunnel.  Each man held on to the next man as a link in a chain.
Support: “One-Another” Passages
Jn 15:12     Love O/A “as I have loved you.”
Gal 5:13ff   In that love serve. Don’t bite, devour!
Rom 14:19  Seek peace, build up, edify.
Rom 15:14  Counsel, instruct.
Col 3:16      Teach and admonish (singing).
Gal 6:1-2    Restore; bear burdens.
1 Th 4:18    Encourage in bereavement.
Jas 5:16     Confess sins and pray.
Heb 3:13    Exhort “today” re: sin.
We need accountability!
Billy’s mom has been teaching him to resist temptation. Each week she says: “Don’t eat the cookies from the cookie jar!” Each week he tries to obey, but he gives into his desire and has a cookie anyway. She suspects him, but she has no proof, so he gets away with it.
What motivation can she use?
Several. She can talk about her authority. God’s pattern. She can tell him that he’s depriving others of cookies. She can threaten to spank him if she sees him.
Finally, when none of that seems to do the job, she adds one last motivation. She says:
“I have counted the cookies.”
Accountability is making sure that someone else has “counted the cookies” in the area(s) in which you are most often tempted.
Accountability is …
Admitting, sharing, and seeking support for …
Hurts, fears, temptations, doubts, and defeats …
Humbly, honestly, transparently, and openly …
With a trusted and respected friend or group …
That can listen, pray, and sometimes advise …
To help you see sin objectively and repent of it …
And support you in every step of progress …
Patiently, in confidence and privacy …
With only God’s will and your good at heart.
Who, How, When, and Where?
How to proceed?
Informally. No outline, no strict, formal instructions. Outgrowth of a friendship you already have. Golf or exercise friend. Elder, Bible school teacher, etc.
Start young. Before troubles start. Some teenagers find such a person or group in their youth group, family (older brother), or school. They remain partners for life.
Some once a month face-to-face; once a week by phone.
Choose a partner (or group) of the same sex as you …
Choose someone that you enjoy being around and spending time with.
Choose someone that you respect spiritually, who is serious about following the will of God.
Choose someone that will be honest, will build you up, will help you. Not a critical nag.
Aim for a balance of encouragement and exhortation, not 50-50 but more like 75-25. That is, 75% encouragement and 25% exhortation.
Agree never to give unsolicited advice or criticism.
“I have some feedback. It may hurt. Are you open to hearing it?”
No one is a spiritual island.
Prov 18:24 – A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
Look for that friend. Be that friend.
Man Up, God’s Girls, L2L groups, Bible classes, Encouragement Teams, Men’s Breakfasts, Retreats
Barriers to Accountability
Pride. Stubbornness. Denial. Embarrassment.
“This is no one else’s business!” Isolationism.
“No one else would understand.” Isolationism.
“This is not that big a deal.” Minimization.
“I can fix this, cover this up, and/or quit this!”
“No one will ever know.”
“Others do this. They don’t admit it. Hypocrites!”
“People will judge me. I’ll look and feel foolish.”
“Once I admit this, I’ll be expected to change it!”
Who wants to admit secret sins to others?
Who wants to appear weak?
Who wants to invite criticism?
Who wants other people checking up on them?
Who wants to become transparent and vulnerable?
Only those who struggle repeatedly with sin and would find it easier to resist if they knew that someone else had counted the cookies!
True Friends
Prov 27:17 – As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.
Prov 27:5-6 – Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.
Prov 28:23 – He who rebukes a man will in the end gain more favor than he who has a flattering tongue.
Real Before/After Support
2 Cor 2:6 Sufficient for such a one …
(one previously held accountable and disciplined for his sin, perhaps re: 1 Cor 5)
is this punishment which was inflicted by the majority, 7 so that on the contrary you should rather forgive and comfort him, otherwise such a one might be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. 8 Wherefore I urge you to reaffirm your love for him.
Possible hymns:
God’s Family
Blest Be the Tie that Binds
How Sweet, How Heavenly
Bring Christ Your Broken Life



Friday, January 29, 2016

Lead Us Not …



My friend and our brother at Keller, Louis Stein, presented this devotional message recently. I asked him if I could share it with you.
James 1: 2-4, 12
A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone. He was short on time and couldn’t find a space with a parking meter. So, he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: “I have circled the block a 100 times. If I don’t park here, I will miss my appointment. FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES.”
When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note. “I’ve circled this block for 10 years. If I don’t give you a ticket, I’ll lose my job. LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION.”
James 1:2-3 says: “2Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, 3knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.”
Temptation is one of our trials. We will experience trials. We all will be tempted. Adam and Eve were tempted in the garden, Eve by the serpent and Adam by Eve; temptation has been with us from the very beginning. Jesus was tempted in the Wilderness. Jesus resisted the temptation, Adam and Eve did not. What was the difference?
I believe attitude was the difference. Jesus did not face temptation with defeatism, but as an opportunity to turn to the scriptures for strength and understanding. Temptation is not sin, but succumbing to temptation is the start of sinning. Rather, temptation is testing and should be viewed as a chance to strengthen our faith. It has been said that “Temptation is to the Christian what a football game is to the trained athlete – an opportunity to prove their ability to win.” When you resist temptation, as James 1:3 says, you show your endurance. And then, the endurance can lead to the desired outcome:     James 1:4 “And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”

When you are tested by temptation and resist, you gain endurance, for we know that we will be tested again. You gain maturity and grow stronger in your faith (“…so that you may be perfect and complete”), You gain independence as your endurance and faith increase (“…lacking in nothing”). You are responsible for your temptation, regardless of where it comes from. And when you have successfully resisted the temptations of this life, at the right time in God’s plan, you will receive from Jesus your just reward.   James 1: 12  “Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.”

Wednesday, October 07, 2015

The Diderot Effect: Having More > Wanting More




Eccl 2:9–11
9 Then I became great and increased more than all who preceded me in Jerusalem. My wisdom also stood by me. 10 All that my eyes desired I did not refuse them. I did not withhold my heart from any pleasure, for my heart was pleased because of all my labor and this was my reward for all my labor. 11 Thus I considered all my activities which my hands had done and the labor which I had exerted, and behold all was vanity and striving after wind and there was no profit under the sun.
Below is an article by James Clear.
The Diderot Effect: Why We Want Things We Don’t Need — And What to Do About It
The famous French philosopher Denis Diderot lived nearly his entire life in poverty, but that all changed in 1765.
Diderot was 52 years old and his daughter was about to be married, but he could not afford to provide a dowry. Despite his lack of wealth, Diderot’s name was well-known because he was the co-founder and writer of Encyclopédie, one of the most comprehensive encyclopedias of the time.
When Catherine the Great, the emperor of Russia, heard of Diderot’s financial troubles she offered to buy his library from him for £1000 GBP, which is approximately $50,000 USD in 2015 dollars. Suddenly, Diderot had money to spare. 
Shortly after this lucky sale, Diderot acquired a new scarlet robe. That’s when everything went wrong. 
The Diderot Effect
Diderot’s scarlet robe was beautiful. So beautiful, in fact, that he immediately noticed how out of place it seemed when surrounded by the rest of his common possessions. In his words, there was “no more coordination, no more unity, no more beauty” between his robe and the rest of his items. The philosopher soon felt the urge to buy some new things to match the beauty of his robe. 
He replaced his old rug with a new one from Damascus. He decorated his home with beautiful sculptures and a better kitchen table. He bought a new mirror to place above the mantle and his “straw chair was relegated to the antechamber by a leather chair.”
These reactionary purchases have become known as the Diderot Effect.
The Diderot Effect states that obtaining a new possession often creates a spiral of consumption which leads you to acquire more new things. As a result, we end up buying things that our previous selves never needed to feel happy or fulfilled.
Denis Diderot as depicted by Louis-Michel van Loo in 1767. In this painting Diderot is wearing a robe similar to the one that prompted his famous essay on the Diderot Effect.
Why We Want Things We Don’t Need
Like many others, I have fallen victim to the Diderot Effect. I recently bought a new car and I ended up purchasing all sorts of additional things to go inside it. I bought a tire pressure gauge, a car charger for my cell phone, an extra umbrella, a first aid kit, a pocket knife, a flashlight, emergency blankets, and even a seatbelt cutting tool.
Allow me to point out that I owned my previous car for nearly 10 years and at no point did I feel that any of the previously mentioned items were worth purchasing. And yet, after getting my shiny new car, I found myself falling into the same consumption spiral as Diderot.
You can spot similar behaviors in many other areas of life:
  • You buy a new dress and now you have to get shoes and earrings to match.
  • You buy a CrossFit membership and soon you’re paying for foam rollers, knee sleeves, wrist wraps, and paleo meal plans.
  • You buy your kid an American Girl doll and find yourself purchasing more accessories than you ever knew existed for dolls.
  • You buy a new couch and suddenly you’re questioning the layout of your entire living room. Those chairs? That coffee table? That rug? They all gotta go.
Life has a natural tendency to become filled with more. We are rarely looking to downgrade, to simplify, to eliminate, to reduce. Our natural inclination is always to accumulate, to add, to upgrade, and to build upon.
In the words of sociology professor Juliet Schor, “the pressure to upgrade our stock of stuff is relentlessly unidirectional, always ascending.” 
Mastering the Diderot Effect
The Diderot Effect tells us that your life is only going to have more things fighting to get in it, so you need to to understand how to curate, eliminate, and focus on the things that matter.
Reduce exposure. Nearly every habit is initiated by a trigger or cue. One of the quickest ways to reduce the power of the Diderot Effect is to avoid the habit triggers that cause it in the first place. Unsubscribe from commercial emails. Call the magazines that send you catalogs and opt out of their mailings. Meet friends at the park rather than the mall. Block your favorite shopping websites using tools like Freedom.
Buy items that fit your current system. You don’t have to start from scratch each time you buy something new. When you purchase new clothes, look for items that work well with your current wardrobe. When you upgrade to new electronics, get things that play nicely with your current pieces so you can avoid buying new chargers, adapters, or cables.
Set self-imposed limits. Live a carefully constrained life by creating limitations for you to operate within. Juliet Schor provides a great example with this quote…
“Imagine the following. A community group in your town organizes parents to sign a pledge agreeing to spend no more than $50 on athletic shoes for their children. The staff at your child’s day-care center requests a $75 limit on spending for birthday parties. The local school board rallies community support behind a switch to school uniforms. The PTA gets 8o percent of parents to agree to limit their children’s television watching to no more than one hour per day.
Do you wish someone in your community or at your children’s school would take the lead in these or similar efforts? I think millions of American parents do. Television, shoes, clothes, birthday parties, athletic uniforms-these are areas where many parents feel pressured into allowing their children to consume at a level beyond what they think is best, want to spend, or can comfortably afford.”
—Juliet Schor, The Overspent American
Buy One, Give One. Each time you make a new purchase, give something an old item away. Get a new TV? Give your old one away rather than moving it to another room. The idea is to prevent your number of items from growing. Always be curating your life to include only the things that bring you joy and happiness.
Go one month without buying something new. Don’t allow yourself to buy any new items for one month. Instead of buying a new lawn mower, rent one from a neighbor. Get your new shirt from the thrift store rather than the department store. The more we restrict ourselves, the more resourceful we become.
Let go of wanting things. There will never be a level where you will be done wanting things. There is always something to upgrade to. Get a new Honda? You can upgrade to a Mercedes. Get a new Mercedes? You can upgrade to a Bentley. Get a new Bentley? You can upgrade to a Ferrari. Get a new Ferrari? Have you thought about buying a private plane? Realize that wanting is just an option your mind provides, not an order you have to follow.
How to Overcome the Consumption Tendency
Our natural tendency is to consume more, not less. Given this tendency, I believe that taking active steps to reduce the flow of unquestioned consumption makes our lives better.
Personally, my goal is not to reduce life to the fewest amount of things, but to fill it with the optimal amount of things. I hope this article will help you consider how to do the same.
In Diderot’s words, “Let my example teach you a lesson. Poverty has its freedoms; opulence has its obstacles.”

FOOTNOTES
  1. In addition to her payment for the library, Catherine the Great asked Diderot to keep the books until she needed them and offered to pay him a yearly salary to act as her librarian. (Source)
  2. Diderot’s scarlet robe is frequently described as a gift from a friend. However, I could find no original source claiming it was a gift nor any mention of the friend who supplied the robe. If you happen to know any historians specializing in robe acquisitions, feel free to point them my way so we can clarify the mystery of the source of Diderot’s famous scarlet robe.
  3. The quotes from Denis Diderot in this article come from his essay, “Regrets for my Old Dressing Gown.”
  4. The Overspent American: Why We Want What We Don’t Need” by Juliet Schor. Chapter 6.
  5. Thanks to my friend Joshua Becker for originally sparking my interest in the Diderot Effect by writing his own article on the topic.